“Dipper, this is the sort of situation that requires finesse, charm, and general Mabel-iness,” says Mabel before trotting Black-Spirit-Beauty-Biscuit up to the train. “PEOPLE OF THE CALAMITY LIMITED!” she shouts. “Sorry for the trouble! We’re not here to hurt you or your fabulous topcoats and corsets! All we seek is a simple object one of you might possess. Do we have your permission to board the train and discuss this?” Mabel surveys the crowd. “Potentially over tea and scones?”

The passengers look at one another, slowly nodding

“We don’t see why not!” yells back one passenger.

“To be honest, that sounds lovely!” yells another.

“Thank you very much, you wonderful angels!” says Mabel before boarding the train with Dipper and Blendin.

Mabel walks down the aisle of the train. She makes a point of complimenting as many passengers as she can. “Hello! Hey, there! Ooooh, look at your mustache! What fine bonnets you have! Is that a bustle? WHAAAAT?” she says.

The passengers smile at Mabel as she passes.

A little boy runs up to her. “Mrs. Bandit Lady, will you please take my daddy’s watch?”

Another kid runs up and pushes his way between the little boy and Mabel. “Take my daddy’s watch!” he says.

“Consarn both of you! Take my watch!” screams a man.

“Guys, guys, calm down!” says Mabel. “I don’t want any of your valuables except for this key!” Mabel unfurls the illustrated treasure map and shows them the Time Key.

Everyone nods.

One man steps forward. “I know of the key you seek!” he says. “A man in frilly frocks with clocks in his beard came on board this train. Before he disappeared, he spoke to me of such a key and said that he was worried that it might be haunted, so he sold it to someone in town. Can’t remember to whom, exactly. Back in town is the key!”

“Awww, sassafras,” says Mabel, turning to leave.

“Wait, don’t go!” calls out the man.

“Yeah, stay! Stay with us!” says a passenger. “We’ve never met such a polite and charming bandit!”

“Awww, I appreciate it, guys, but I really need to find that key!” says Mabel.

“Come on, just stay for one sarsaparilla?” begs the boy. “It’s a weird old-timey root drink that we inexplicably love!”

Mabel looks at Dipper.

Dipper shakes his head.

Mabel looks back at all the passengers’ smiling faces.

A little girl tugs on Mabel’s skirt.

“Oh, man. What should I do?” asks Mabel.

STAY FOR SARSAPARILLAS: GO HERE POLITELY DECLINE AND GO BACK TO TOWN: GO HERE